Here we have my second attempt of recording a captain everything interview. But what happened when I tried listening to it the next morning? I found that the bastardly annoyingly cheap piece of shit didn't record for the second time, with the same bloody band!!! Obviously, I wasn't at all happy and decided to slit both my wrists with my maths equipment and listen to tonnes of hardcore, metalcore, pissedoffcore, blackclothingcore, frowncore, goawaycore, iwanttobedepressedfortherestofmylifecore, knotcore, shitcore, chainnecklacedcore, ihavenofriendscore, myschoolsuckscore, bringmeashotguncore, fuckyouallcore, blackmakeupcore, georginaisabitchcore, ihateyouallcore music. Anyway, a few days later I recovered from my mental illness called "losing yet another captain everything interview" and began writing up everything I could remember from Saturday the 1st Feb.. that dates going to haunt me forever more now! If anyone wishes to show me that they actually care, cards and flowers will be more than welcome. REMEMBER: This is all being written from memory. Here it is: Richie - Drums Lew - Vocals / Guitar Jon - Bass / Backing Vocals Q - Hows everyone and hows the Mustard Plug tour going? A - Fine and dandy Q - Out of your last three tours, what was the strangest thing that has happened? A - Lew had toilet roll thrown at him. But he did actually need to take a shit, so it came in handy. Lew - Playing in Europe! That was strange Q - Whats the most embarrassing moment on stage? A - I can't remember Q - Why do you think you fit into the ska/punk scene when you're not really a typical ska/punk band? A - They don't know Q - And when was it in the life of Captain Everything that you realised you had done it? A - They don't know. They said there wasn't really a particular CD or gig that they had done which pushed them into that scene, so they just magically appeared! However, I believe that the answer could have been: When they signed to 20 deck and featured on the deck less comp - as thats how I ( and a couple others ) first heard of them. Who knows.. Q - Why did you leave 20 deck? A - Was nothing personal. - unfortunately. (I like arguments between people). The reason was because on 20deck all they really managed to do was release a split with Route 215 and nothing more. Where as, now that they're on house hold name, they've been going on crap loads more tours and losing a lot more sleep, which they seem to really enjoy. Q - To Jon and Lew, How did you learn to play the guitar AND sing at the same time?! A - Final answer - Practice   Q - This wasn't much of a question. I need to complain about your music, it's twitchy. Me: I was listening to you on the bus and had this really annoying twitch in the corner of my eye and it makes me want to hit someone Jon: our music makes you angry? Me: no, it's just really fidgity, A - I think I got an apology in here somewhere and found out that Jon also gets eye twitches - which is reassuring. Q - Lewis, you've never had a pet!! Lew: no, I haven't Me: why not? Lew: you've been reading that lightyear interview! Richie: that was when we were going through everyones porn star names wasn't it? Lew: my porn star name is Lewis.. Me: Why don't you get a pet? Lew: I think I will, and I'll name it something like "Big Penis" so my porn star name will be Big Penis Lewis. Do you see what I've done there? Me: yes, thats quite clever Q - Why is there an Exclamation mark after your name? (Captain Everything!) A - Theres a band in America who are also called Captain Everything but they didn't know about it at the time, so they just decided to add a '!' after their name. Plus it looks nicer. Captain Everything! Captain everything. see the difference?? The exclamation mark says it all Q - (my favourite question) Using five words/whatever each, describe a member of Captain Everything! A - The only word I can really remember was said by Richie when describing Jon, which was "Chin"   Q - Are you ever gonna re release your music by idiots cd? cos theres some songs on there which I really like! A - No, because the content of that cd wasn't good enough for releasing again even if it were to be recorded again. Although, some of the songs from that CD have been put onto newer releases. Q - This question came out incredibly wrong and if I had my own radio station, I would make a public apology to Lewis for "slagging him off" - I really didn't mean it in a nasty way! Who sang Gastroenteritis? Lew: Jon did A - and here I stupidly started saying how Lew shouldn't do his fake American accent anymore and should learn to sing in a British almost cockney accent like Jon's. This not only offended Lew, but offended Jon also - as no one likes being referred to as "cockney".. anyway, if I were smart enough, I would have replied to Lew's answer by saying " sounds good " (directed at Jon) and then moved onto the next question, but I didn't.. cos I'm dumb and have many lessons yet to be learnt! (says my science teacher) I love fake American accents!! Q - (I start writing down their answer for the next question) Why do you think bands like spunge and jessejames are known as sell outs as soon as they are shown on Kerrang? A - Don't know. Q - Theres a song which starts off like the beginning of "take on me", right? At the end you can hear someone puking up, who is that? A - It was one of their friends at a party (?). They put it at the end of one of their songs because they found it funny, but the humour soon wore off and they didn't add it to the second version of that song, because it was sick (get it?) Q - (finished writing the answer for this question) Who's the nicest person you've met on tour so far? Jon: You are by far the nicest person we've met on tour so far. Therefore, we, as a band believe that everyone should give her Me: Me* You* Jon: loads of free stuff and worship her forever more. She, her, You. same thing Me: that didn't sound fake at all! =laughs= Q - how do you respond to the fans of house hold name (for example) who don't like your music and tell you you're shit? A - same way we respond to the people who do like our music and tell us we're good. Q - Do you reckon you'll ever make a music video? A - Yes Q - Plans for the near future? A - Recording a new CD in a couple of weeks Final words - "Howards Alias rule" and "Thanks for slagging me off" The End. Buy: Me a dictaphone which fucking works Visit: www.captaineverything.co.uk Look at: Lew's tattoos! I didn't notice any of them til I was looking through all my pictures afterwards. Theres a really nice one of something on fire going down his left arm - I like that one. Also, I noticed one on Richie's leg which you can sort of see in one of the pictures saying "play faster". Captain Everything with Captain Everything tattoos.. clever idea! Also, if anyone happens to be seeing this band soon, apologise to them from me!! DO IT!