Info: Pud screams like a girl! It was pretty difficult to hear what everyone was saying as this was done in a toilet durin a bands set, so I've had to re-arrange some of the words so that they make sense. PLUS, as you should all have guessed by now, it's not easy picking up everyones voice / accent, so I doubt I've got all the naming right either. Key: Crooks: Richard Jeremy: The guy from airport Duck Boy: ask Dave Me: Me Leo: Leo Pud:  Pud Dan: Ant's friend   Me: who wants to be incharge of the dictaphone? Crooks: let me hold it... wheres the mic? Jeremy: it's recording you twat Me: hello to you all! All: hello! Me: do you know my name? Duck boy: no Me: my names Jeremy: Fran Me: well done!! Jeremy: thank you! I read your e-mail Me: yay Dan: =whispers= Jamie's a nerd May I please have your names and who does what? Jeremy: thats Pud - plays bass Pud: I'm pud, I play bass Crooks: the mics there, dick head Pud: I'm Pud, I play bass Duck boy: I'm paul, I sing Leo: Leo - play guitar Crooks: Richard, play guitar Jeremy: Jamie - on the drum sticks Pud: why'd you call yourself richard? Crooks: alright, my names Crooks Pud: crooky Short background on One Day Elliott? Duck boy: Well, ok. we uesd to be really crap. Me: ok.. Duck boy: and umm, we got fed up of being crap so we decided to get rid of our guitarist and get two new good guitarists. And then we started writing up different songs and we got better. Me: good plan Paul: yeah it is, and ummm, yeah, we've just been like, doing loads of gigs and getting some money together Jeremy: we're recording soon Paul: yeah, new cd Leo: new cd in April Crooks: April Jeremy: =sings a long to mpa= Me: I've never heard this song before =two girls attempt to enter the toilet= Pud: come in! =laughter= =they leave= Me: I feel well guilty now Jeremy: don't worry, they can pee in the bushes When did One Day Elliott start? Duck boy: well originally, it started about 4 years ago Leo: 1999 Duck boy: something like that Crooks: yeah, ish Duck boy: and then ummm, our current line up has been here for about a year and a bit. We've had all of our songs since then aswell. Crooks: pretty much all.. basically Duck boy: we tend to just... Crooks: what one are we upto now? Me: you're on number four What are you planning on.... Jeremy: recording Me: doing in the near future? Ducky: yeah, we're basically on like, a tour with Morgan's puff adder, raising some cash for a new album and.. it'll cost quite a lot but ummmm, and we're starting from January through to March and then we're touring in April Me: this is pretty Ducky: Pud, by the way, is the one on the tape wearing a really gay (pink) feather bower and he thinks he looks really good in it - but he doesn't Pud: Pauls just jealous because he is gay... and Canadian Ducky: I'm not gay! Pud: look, he's not gay. Pauls not gay. ok? =rewinds the tape (but didn't do a very good job at it)= Paul's not gay. I sa.. He's not gay! Ducky: tell them I'm not gay again Pud: he's not gay Jeremy: Paul is not gay everybody Pud: not gay Dan: paul is gay =laughter= What's the scene in MAIDSTONE like? Jeremy: lovely Crooks: =laughs= lovely.. Jeremy: nice trees Me: right.. Duck Boy: well no, it's good. There's a lot of people into that sort of scene. but, but the older people are a bit like, Crooks: Yeah, the older guys just stand there and are like... Duck Boy: Although, we are doing a really good gig next Thursday with Morgan's puff adder at the Uni Bar and it's an all ages show so anyone can come. So thats gonna' be pretty good cos other kids are like really enthusiastic but they can't get in when we do our normal shows cos they're too young, so we're doing a show just for them Me: aaaawww Jeremy: aaawww indeed Me: s'very loyal of you Duck boy: aren't we sweet? Crooks: Yeah, the answer to your next question happens everytime on stage... Pud gets up. =laughter= Leo: what was the next question? Most embarrassing moment on stage? Pud: It's usually when Mafro comes on stage and whips down his jacket and he's got a fucking lepard skin thong on Ducky: no, it was when we were playing with Capdown and we played really really really badly. Jamie: no, I don't think that counts. The most embarrassing thing that happened was definately Mafro taking all his clothes off except for his jock strap Me: wasn't that here...? Ducky: it's happened a couple of times Jeremy: he does it regularly Pud: he does it to us all the time Me: and the funniest thing? Jeremy: same again Ducky: yeah, probably that as well. I dunno, what are the funny things? none of us have actually fallen down or anything have we? Jeremy: you do that jump sometimes... Paul: thats not funny - thats cool =laughter= Your Fat Red Indian... Krew... Tour...thats a mouthful Ducky: oh yes! right, umm Me: how did that go? Ducky: a couple of years ago, me and our old guitarist, insted of just trying to do all our gigs on our own we hooked up with a couple other bands and organized the gigs together and just go around on like, another tour thing Me: and this was with MARTiN and Morgan's puff.. no, that's now. Ducky: no, yeah. The 1st time it was us, 18th emergency, martin and keg. That went quite well, except for the last gig, actually, that was the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened. On our last gig, Pud set off all the fire extinguishers and then it cost us about 800 quid - so we lost all the money from the whole tour, which was quite funny. umm, but yeah, it went quite well apart from that. so we organized another one this year with us, uhhh, Morgan's puff adder and augustus gloop Jeremy: and a big big big crate of beer Crooks: and smutline Leo: and smutline Ducky: yeah, smutline were booking all the gigs Jeremy: Smutline and augustus gloop, I like, they just, I dunno.. they lose their members Ducky: I feel really bad, we should be supporting Morgan's puff adder right now. Jeremy: Krew was spelt with a K (I had it written down as Crew) Me: is it really?! Jeremy: yeah Me: I'm so sorry Crooks: no, they're alright, we've seen them plenty of times Ducky: it's still out of order man, we should be showing them our support Crooks: whats the next question? Me: ah, I'm sorry, d'you wanna go out and.. we're still talking about.. Pud: Paul, you can go. Ducky: can we stop and then start again later? Me: sure Jamie: no, don't worry about it Crooks: no, best to crack on Ducky: make sure you play this tape to Morgan's puff adder so they can hear that I'm actually sticking up for them and the others aren't interested Crooks: I'm interested, but I'm sure they'd understand! Jeremy: I want to see them, but.. Leo: alright, carry on.. Jeremy: =starts saying something= Ducky: SHUT UP! Crooks: Jamie's being noisey again Name a local band you really really hate.. and slag them off as much as you can. Leo: a local band... Me: one that I'll know Ducky: ooh, hang on Leo: we like all bands, we're not allowed to slag anyone off Crooks: we try and pay friendlyness between all bands Paul: if someones like, brave enough to write stuff and get out there and perform it... I mean, we know what it feels like to have someone go "oh, you're shit" without even bothering to listen to us. I mean, we don't get on well with some bands and we like, do think some bands arent very good but its fair play and we just hope they get better. And we're not naming names, cos thats not fair. Me: you're too smart for these questions.. it's not fair! Pud: =laughs= I'm not, ask me =laughter= Crooks: don't ask Pud anything Pud: whats your name? uhhh... I forgot Best joke you all know? Paul: best joke... Crooks: ok, i got a good one. well lots of people probably already know this joke. =asks Jeremy= bass player or drummer? Jeremy: drummer Crooks: what do drummers.. what does our drummer use for contraception? =silence= Crooks: his personality =laughter= Jeremy: ha ha ha you wanker Crooks: ok, whats pink and hangs out your pants? Jamie: your mom Crooks: your mom.. you never do that, alright? Never interrupt someone elses joke! And you only did that cos' I told you it before! What do you call a fly with no wings? Pud: I dunno.. just a bee, or something.. Crooks: =laughs= a walk =laughter= Jamie: a bee or something? Ducky: I haven't really got anything funny to say 1st job you ever got? Leo: as a band? or singlely? Me: Singlely Ducky: 1st job is the same job we're doing now Jamie: I worked for Marks n Spencers in that laundre' department Me: and how old were you? Jamie: uhhh, 16 Leo: I thought you worked in the car park in the park (pub?) Crooks: he sat in a box, right? and took 50p off everyone who drived past Jamie: yeah, that was after I worked in the laundre' department. I moved around in marks and spencers Ducky: crooks, what was your first job? Crooks: I worked in WH smiths Jamie: Which was next door to Marks and Spencers Ducky: me and pud worked polishing plumbs =laughter= Ducky: we actually had to polish the condensation off plumbs all day Pud: I really enjoyed that, it was cool Jamie: LIAR! Ducky: Pud loved it, alright. I hated it. 8 hours, rubbing plumbs.. Leo: my first job was at... Jamie: Safeways Crooks: selling cigarettes Ducky: you were an ass licker, thats what you were. Leo: fuck off =laughter= Ducky: you licked ass holes all day Leo: fuck off =laughter= Ducky: one pound an hour Leo: fuck off Pud: a shiney penny every day Leo: fuck off Crooks: Next question Using five words / points / actions / songs / whatever each, describe a member of.. whats your band..? Jeremy: it's written there Me: it is, but I was trying to memorise it. One day elliott. Crooks: oh oh oh Jamie, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanker! =laughter= Pud: JAIYMEE! Crooks: I got one, I got one, count - Paul, Is, A, Canadian, Cunt. =laughter= Jeremy: Quack Quack Ducky: I gotta think of something much better.. pass it round =passes dictaphone to Leo= Leo: uhhhhh Paul: Crooks', never, had, a, girlfriend =laughter= Crooks: I've, had, lots. I have had Pauls mother though, so, it makes up. Counts as many. =laughter= Me: =talks to Jeremy= I think someones missed you out! Jamie: no, they all said wanker. Me: oh yes.. Crooks and Pud: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanker Crooks and Ducky: Jaiymee, Jaiymee, JAIYMEE!! Leo: self, confessed, stink, dropping, wanker =laughter= Me: =to Jamie= oh my god! I've just realised, you're the guy off airport!! =laughter= Jeremy: NO! NO! Crooks: Jeremy.. Jeremy or something.. Me: thats it Crooks: you're a fucking jeremy Jeremy: no I'm fucking not Ducky: he's a fudge packer as well, isnt he? =laughter= Jeremy: so how long does this tape go on for? Me: 30 minutes on one side, and half an hour on the other Jeremy: 60 minute tape then Me: you could say that Jeremy: alright then Best song you've recorded / written? Jamie: oooooooohhhh Ducky: best song we've recorded... Jamie: or written Ducky: or written? Best song we've written might be time will tell Crooks: yeah, I'd say time will tell Pud: I think they're all quite good at the moment Crooks: yet to come Jamie: yeah! Leo: crooks is working on one Ducky: I think we should write a song called "one day elliotts greatest hits" Crooks: What was that Macho Man song called? I loved that Paul: oh, Elizabeth is a bitch. My hero is the Macho Man something savage (?) and I wrote a song about it Pud: Paul would rather have sex with Macho man than any girl Paul: true..... But I'm not gay! Crooks: thats why he's gay =laughter= =someone (haven't got a clue who it was) starts talking about spider man= Crooks: next question. We don't wanna go into this, no one cares about Macho man - except Paul. =reads questions= there are no worst songs. Ducky: whats the worst song we've written...? All: The toilet =laughter= Pud and Crooks: THE TOILET duh nuh nuh nuh =others join in= duh nuh nuh duh nuh nuh nuh nuh THE TOILET duh nuh nuh-nuh nuh nuh Me: I wanna hear that! Pud: no you don't Ducky and Jeremy: you don't. Ducky: worst song.. thats basically what it was. The worst song we've recorded was probably uhhh.. Jeremy: oh that "FYCP (?) productions, faversham baby" Ducky: that wasn't a bad song, it was just recorded like shit Jeremy: oh it was recorded terribly, yeah. Crooks: ah, now you've just promoted them as they're shit Jeremy: oh shit =laughter= Jeremy: I liked it Crooks: take all that back. Ducky: Erase that bit, they're not Jeremy: anyway.. they're not Any plans for extending or removing the members in One Day Elliott? (I still haven't bothered re-phrasing this question) Pud: ha ha, moving, he he Me: RE moving Pud: oh! Me: =laughs= Jamie: extending or removing... Crooks: we're thinking about removing Puds guts Ducky: yeah, and we're thinking about extending Jamie's penis because it's so something (problem # 213 with wording) Crooks: we're going to remove half of Puds gut! Ducky: donate it to charity =laughter= Crooks: honestly, if you send it to Nigerea, fucking eithiopians would kill for this sort of shit =laughter= Crooks: we're really harsh aren't we? sorry about that.. Ever caught a pigeon? Pud: caught a pigeon... Jamie: I've killed a pheasant and I've run over a badger Ducky: have any of us got off with any rough birds, is that what you mean? I don't know what that means.. Me: uh, no. Right, there's this bird that can fly and it's called a pigeon and Paul: oh, caught a pigeon Crooks: =laughs= I can't believe she just had to explain what a pigeon was Ducky: w'no no no no no, I know what a pigeon is! I thought she said "have you pulled a pigeon" Leo: not do you know what a pigeon is Paul: yeah, it's a fucking duck. I've never caught a pigeon but when we were playing on the Isle of Sheppey we did see a pigeon die and fall out of the sky =laughter= Paul: I'm not lying. I saw it happen, right. Crooks: I caught a b.. Paul: Birds must die all the time - granted, yeah? Crooks: I caught a... Paul: But you never ever see them die and then drop. Crooks: I caught... Paul: But I did, on the isle of Sheppey Crooks: SHUT UP!!!! I caught a bee once in a pringle thing Pud: yeah, that was well good! Ducky: and you kept it for like, a week Crooks: yeah, we stuck it in the car Jamie: we probably still got it at home somewhere =laughter= Pud: that bee's dead isn't he =laughs= Me: well thats the end of that then! Pud: oh oh oh. what about, everyones got a noise haven't they? mines this: EEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH Ducky: no, I'm not doing one Crooks: MUUUUHHH Ducky: do Jamies, Jamies ones actually the most aggressive Jamie: Hurgh hurgh hurgh-hurgh-hurgh-hurgh Pud: EEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE Ducky: Waaaaanker! All: Jaiymee, Jaiymee, JAIIIYMEEE Leo: turn the thing off, you're wasting batteries Crooks: whats your name again? Me: my names Frab. no, Fran! not Frab. Fran Fran Fran Crooks: thanks Fran. It's been a pleasure. Me: Thank you! Your names Rich / Richie / Richard.. am I correct? Crooks: yep   Visit: www.onedayelliott.co.uk Look at: I don't think any of them have tattoos.. so just look at Paul. However, "For my information, 3 of the 5 people in one day elliott have tattoos, 2 of which are big ones!" Buy: Their new cd.. when it comes.